After giving in and setting projects aside, I slept for 12 hours last night. Only to wake feeling no relief, but more fatigue. Operating on about 1 cylinder for only a few hours today, I was ready to crash again. The MN showcase was a blast and i really feel like we were able to put on something very special. But to be honest I was looking forward to its conclusion to free up my time and energy so that I could get started with a training program worthy of moving across the country. After a light workout on Sunday I have not had the time or energy to train again, and that "light workout" made me so incredibly sore. Stricken with guilt I find myself looking to a full plate of projects and commitments tomorrow that start at 7am, and probably finish at 9pm, but are necessary for my financial survival. My back is unhappy with the abuse it has taken over the past 4 weeks, and the aches and pains drain my energy like a workout all its own. After being slapped around this weekend by poles so small I normally wouldn't even pick them up, I'm dying to get fit again.
Settling in has been hard, and each day i tell myself that things will calm down, and they will. But I'm getting eager and borderline self conscious. I'm 15 pounds lighter than normal and when I see myself in the mirror, I see a distance runner, not a pole vaulter. With a solid training cycle under my belt my confidence will sky rocket. Its time to be more proactive, learn all these dam schedules, and coordinate a program built for me. So tomorrow is day 3 of rest (which drives me insane) and i will use the evening to write up a plan that will take me to Eugene Oregon in June for the US outdoor championships.